There Is a Wrong Time to Start a Family

Kristen

As young as five years old, I understood without real understanding that when I grew into a woman I would someday, inevitably, become a mother.

As a little girl, I semi-regularly played the game of House with a friend who lived in the next apartment building, and we’d choose our roles before each game: Husband or Wife. We took for granted that choosing Wife also meant playing the role of a mother.


Read the rest in Human Parts.

What don’t you get about the childfree? Q&A

Kristen

This post is a response to a Huffington Post article by Ann Brenoff titled, “Midlife ramblings: What I don’t get about my childless/childfree young friends.”

Specifically, this part:

I happen to agree that people who don’t want children should not have them. I’m delighted to wish you well on whatever road you take, but I do find myself stopping mid hand-wave and asking this question: Really?

How can you be so sure? I think having kids is one of those things you should probably never say never about.

Telling everyone they should have kids isn’t just mind-blowingly annoying, it’s dangerous.

Kristen

I was visiting my childhood friend, now a mother, when dinner time arrived. She squirted ketchup onto her daughter’s plate and then her son’s. And then mine. I looked at it.

She immediately recognized her mistake and laughed. She knew I could squirt my own ketchup, she said, but she was just so used to doing it… She apologized (still laughing) for overstepping her role as “mother” by inadvertently mothering me.

Where my friend excelled is where many other women, such as Kathleen Parker in her column “Of pleasure and parenthood,” fail miserably. They overstep their role as mother by saying things, as Parker did, such as, “It’s hard to know for certain that one doesn’t want children. Many don’t, until they do.”

Man who pontificated over T. Swift’s (and every other woman’s) uterus gets angry when someone does it to his daughter

Kristen

I recently had a short Twitter discussion with Stefan Molyneaux that revealed: 1. all women but “his” women are fair targets, and 2. the reason he won’t come on our show. (Scared, you might reasonably think, but he had another reason.) It all began like this:

Great Expectations (?)

Kristen

Recently, I shared an article on Facebook about three white supremacists who were arrested by the FBI. Someone commented, “Is there anything more pathetic than someone trying to use skin pigment to claim some sort of superiority?” 

Something about that comment made me think of motherhood. Not the day-to-day operation of raising a child, but the idea of motherhood.